Eh, Eh It’s UK Eh

Posted: July 2, 2016 in TransOceanic
Tags: ,

Mere mention of London in my blog and I was able fish many readers, their likes and appreciation. Happy, defiantly I am, eh(picked it from Londoners).”Ella rascala, I stay in Bangalore and write about Metro, thunder burst in office washrooms, strain my back to click church street never dying street side pool and you don’t give rats ass(not you my darling regular readers) I travel  to the Land of romance, cold, ”OH, Dear!!”,change two flight getting up every freaking time(they were sweetheart thankfully) lady and guy sitting next to me had to go to toilet and mention London and then I have your attention all of it? Hypocrites (eyes blazing fire, fore finger pointed) It’s not your underwear you need to change every day but your damn freaking mentality.(wow, I write so well ).

If you are in London you don’t need knife, pepper spray, dragger to carry in your bag, “You Ok”,”Have a wonderful day”, “That’s all right”,”THANK YOU”, “You are welcome” some more easy squeeze words in your pocket and you are ready to taste their hospitality. They are way too sweet for us Indians and its difficult for me because I have to go back to the same sea where day starts with arguing with driver and ends with cursing the BMTC bus conductors. I already feel like the tactics and lessons I learned to survive in Bangalore are overshadowed by these Brits touch. Men give way, “After you mam” say whenever they see a lady waiting, oh god they all are gentleman (defiantly I should marry one). I zone out seeing their manners and come back to reality when my fellow Indian macho man closes the door on my face and drop the paper while walking. “Illiterates bastards with Engineering degree” no wonder Modijis is tired of sweeping the streets of out dear rotting country.

Men are always men

So other day I was working in graveyard shift. Yawning (I always do) I got into the bus and sat with my companion 8kg 4gb laptop. A healthy lady, (I would not call her fat as she had right meat at right place; you know what I mean) with her small kid in pram got in the bus , followed by this old man in brown color over coat. When the bus started to move the baby started crying, the lady go up from her seat and bent over the pram consoling the kid. There was her G-string saying hello to the viewers with broad smile. As I was sitting in golden class I nodded my head from a distance and looked out of the glass window. Somehow this old man’s eyes fell on this beautiful thing and he was hypnotized beyond his own control, at least I felt that. I am sure for that precise moment his heart was pumping the blood in high rate and his veins felt young again. I couldn’t help myself but smile when he went on enjoying the show. Men, Africa or China they will be always men. After glorious 1 minute he turned back to make sure his dirty deed was safe with him. But there was me sitting and giggling on my seat.

Loving and Understanding that’s how the husband should be.

As I am suffering from lack of social skills being in London for two months didn’t help me to increase the count of my friend’s list. So there is this 6ft, thin married guy(don’t get ideas) in his late 30 who had the privilege to have my annoying company. Wherever he went I followed him like tail following the dog. I am sure certain point of time all he wanted to is blackout me(I am just guessing). One day after forcibly following him in TESCO, stopping at every counter he stopped talking all time. My eyes raised when he picked up a bunch of flowers

“Flowers, is something special today” there’s was me, ready with my question with eyes brows raised.

“No nothing like that, they are for my wife” He said politely examining the flowers he picked carefully.

“Is it her bday today?” One day definitely my face would be smashed beyond repair for my nonstop questions.

“No, just like that. Every month I buy her flowers. She doesn’t have friends here, always busy with household things and kids…..” he went on explaining me and I was there glaring at him open mouth. “This kind of men EXISTS?” I asked myself that too Indian.

There is more to write and clock is ticking. With 2 months rolled silently I want to hold on to every second, every minute, every hour, live them whole heartily because time is something I can never roll back.

eh ehe



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